


A Family To Die For

by hyperius



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Angst, Damian Wayne Cares, Damian Wayne is a good brother, Dick Grayson is a Ray of Sunshine, Family, Fluff, It's all fluff till the end, Jason Todd Loves His Brothers, Protective Jason Todd, Tim Drake Cares, good angst, happy tears, then angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:20:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23744458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyperius/pseuds/hyperius
Summary: “Master Jason, I believe we both know dental floss is not to be considered proper medical equipment. I taught you better than that,” Jason’s anger quickly deflated into shame and embarrassment because, yeah, Alfred did teach him better.Whether Jason believes it or not, he's family. Fortunately, he came to believe when it mattered most.
Relationships: Dick Grayson & Jason Todd, Jason Todd & Damian Wayne, Tim Drake & Jason Todd
Comments: 55
Kudos: 352





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is the sad ending, the next chapter is the happy ending! So I guess, pick your ending. Tragedy, or happiness.

How did this become his life? The Bats were even more insufferable than normal, and Jason genuinely thought that was impossible. He really, truly did. However, like they always try to do, the Bats decided to defy his expectations and go above and beyond. In annoyance.

Like now.

As he stepped into his apartment, or one that was _supposed_ to be his apartment, and he knows it’s supposed to be his because it has his over the top bat security, his delicately placed hair in the crack of the door that would fall if anyone opened it - and yet, as he stepped into his apartment, none of his items were in it. Was he robbed?

Except he wasn’t robbed, because there was a little note in the middle of his once messy kitchen letting him know all his item were moved to his room within the manor. _Like hell_.

Before he even had time to think, he was on his motorcycle breaking every possible speed limit to arrive at Wayne Manor, jumping off his bike as soon as he parked, all but kicking open the doors and marching in, not caring to wait to be let in. If they are gonna break in and steal all his fucking stuff, then he won’t respect their ‘privacy.’ It seemed they were expecting it, though, because they were all not-so-coincidentally gathered in the dining room, with a - get this - with an empty spot set at the table, as if they were waiting for him.

Oh, _like hell_.

He very pointedly did not sit down, “What the hell did you people do?! Where’s my shit?!”

Bruce took a sip of coffee, and Dick smiled all too innocently. Much to his surprise, though, it was Tim who spoke around a mouthful of waffle, “We moved you into the manor.”

“I know! I mean, why the hell would you do that?!” Jason was very much not calm, and very much feeling the need to strangle a Bat.

Damian scoffed, his little baby kitten-trying-to-be-tough scoff, “You are clearly unable to care for yourself, so we have decided to be of aid.”

“I- what?!” Can’t take care of himself? He’s been fucking taking care of himself ever since he crawled out of the fucking Pit. And yeah, so maybe Thalia helped him for a bit, but after that! And- and even before he was adopted, when he was taking care of himself on the streets. When he was taking care of himself, and his dying mother. Hell, he has always been taking care of himself, he’s always been alone, he’s always been- he had to. He had to learn early to survive. So this? This freaking accusation? He’s not having it. “I have been doing just fucking fine, long before any of you gave a damn.” He was proud, just a bit, at how that put a little damper on their moods. Good.

His head snapped over when Dick gave a little sigh. This was his ‘I’m trying to be a good big brother to a ridiculous little brother and it’s tiring’ sigh. It’s the sigh Jason hates the most. “You got shot during last weeks case.”

“So?”

“You said you had it handled.”

“And I do!”

“So that’s why, when I went to your apartment, to check up on you, you didn’t have any pain med? And there was dental floss in your needle, and not any proper, y’know, medical thread?”

So, ok, maybe Jason has neglected getting proper stuff for a while, but that’s his problem, and his alone, “One, dental floss works and makes everything minty fresh,” It’s a plus, “Two, you shouldn’t have been in my damn apartment without me there!” Jason has been doing good. He hasn’t seriously attacked any of the bats for over a year. He hasn’t killed in over three months. Though, right about now, he feels like it’s time to ruin those records. These bastards deserve a bullet through the brains.

Not that he’ll do it, but by the way they all remain relaxed regardless of his anger, he has realized he’s probably been going too soft on them. Someone needs to get beaten up, and it’s going to be Dick. But before he could kick Dick’s ass in front of everybody, Alfred walked into the room. Which was, definitely, the one and only reason he didn’t beat up Dickie.

“Master Jason, I believe we both know dental floss is not to be considered proper medical equipment. I taught you better than that.” Jason’s anger quickly deflated into shame and embarrassment because, yeah, Alfred did teach him better, “I requested Master Dick and the others to move you into the manor, so you can receive proper support until you are able to correctly care for yourself once again.” Then, the old butler gave him the legendary ‘test-me’ eyebrow raise, and Jason swallowed, kicking the floor with a little sigh. He felt twelve again.

“I understand.”

“Now please take your seat, Master Jason. I will bring out your breakfast.”

Jason silently slid into his seat, ignoring the snickering of the other bats. Fuck them.

“I am glad you’re going to be staying with us, Jaylad,” Jason tensed, staring up at Bruce in utter disbelief. _What_? Bruce only smiled, “What? It is nice to have you back.”

Jason felt his cheeks burn with a blush, but he hid it under a very indignant, “Fuck you!”

No one seemed bothered, though. If anything, it spawned only more positive chatter, and Jason was left to once again wonder how this became his life. He also wondered, for just a bit, when the others began to understand him so well - and why he doesn’t seem to mind the fact.

Life at the manor was chaotic, to say the least. Jason knows, theoretically, Dick is supposed to be living in Bludhaven, but the asshole seems to be here more than not. He wondered how long that’s been the case.

He’s staying in a guest room, technically. One step into the room he had when he was Robin, when he was a child, when he was Bruce’s son - and he went running. It took Dick and Bruce talking him down, and ultimately Alfred promising to make up a new room for him, to get him back. That room, with all the memories and ghosts and magic was too much. It was way too much, and it only reminded him of everything he’s not, of everything he’s failed at, of everyone’s he’s disappointed.

Now, avoiding that room, he’s doing pretty well. As well as it could be for him, at least.

Jason woke up screaming. It was raining through patrol, and he may have been tossed into some mud, much to his embarrassment. He knew what it would trigger, though, looking down at the dirt dripping from his body - he was going to dream of his coffin, of suffocating beneath packed dirt, of broken fingers and blood drip, drip, dripping onto his face as he scratched at impenetrable wood. He dreamt, and when he woke throat raw, scream breaking on a sob, he looked over to see a little, pint-sized stalker staring at him,

Jason was really not in the mood to be berated by the little demon, so he simple scowled while aggressively rubbing the evidence from his eyes, “The hell you want?”

Damian tt-ed, “I request your presence in the movie room.”

“I-what?” That… certainly wasn’t what he expected.

“I’ll dumb it down for you’re delayed mind. I want you to join me for a movie. Immediately.”

Well, “Ok,” Jason knew he isn’t going to be able to sleep again, anyway. Besides, watching a movie with Damian would probably be a better way to spend the foreseeable future. Otherwise, he’d just sit in bed and fall prey to a panic attack as the nightmare, _the memory_ , plays over and over again in his mind. So, Jason rolled out of bed, silently following Damian into the movie room. Damian already had a movie paused, “The Cat Returns”, if Jason recognizes the title. “Studio Ghibli?”

“Drake is attempting to ‘catch me up’ on modern media.”

Jason huffed. He wouldn’t readily admit it, but he fell a bit behind in modern media too. Dying, and being kidnapped by the League of Assassin, and then going on a crazy revenge-fueled tirade, before going underground and becoming an outlaw, doesn’t give much time to watch movies. “Well, we can catch up together. How does that sound?”

Jason would swear on it, he saw Damian smile with a little nod.

Silently, they settled on the couch and started the movie. It felt nice, not talking. They were just there, for each other, without having to force interaction. As much as he’d never admit to loving Dick, the man always needs to talk and talk and fill the silence. Sometimes, it was exactly what they needed, but other times, it’s just too much. Overwhelming, really. Tim was nice, and he could go between comfortable silences and nice conversations, but sometimes Tim gets so distracted, it doesn’t feel like they’re enjoying each other’s company, but rather, simply, sharing a room. Damian somehow mastered this little, comfortable silences. It felt nice. And the movie, as ridiculous as it is, as much as Jason was feeling like a Furry watching it, it’s nice. It’s what Dick would call a ‘feel good’ movie, just something to make his brain go numb and enjoy.

At some point during the movie, Damian found his way into Jason’s lap, with Jason’s arms wrapped around his waist in a gentle hug.

At a later point, they fell asleep in that position.

When they woke, Tim was on the couch working on his computer beside them, Dick, somehow, squirreled his way behind Jason to support them both, and Bruce was beside Tim, reaching out to to have Tim tucked under his arm, and a hand on Jason’s shoulder, rubbing comforting circles into the tight muscle there. And if Jason let out a small, happy breath, curling further into his older brother to fall asleep again? He’s sure everyone noticed, but no one would dare say a thing.

History has a habit of repeating itself, so do these events. As it happened, Damian had the room next to Jason, which was why he woke to Jason screaming. That also means Jason can hear when the little demon wakes crying. Whenever Jason wakes to Damian’s screams, he finds himself wandering into the other’s room. Sometimes he drags his younger brother out to watch a movie, and sometimes he simply crawls in behind his younger brother, pulling him into a hug and reciting every story he’s ever memorized until Damian falls back into a peaceful slumber.

Whenever Jason wakes screaming, Damian comes in. Damian usually pulls him to watch one of the movies on what Jason learned is the younger boys very long and extensive movie list, and sometimes he drags Jason into the library and reads one of the books he picked off the shelf. They always ended up, by morning, with the rest of the family somehow crowded around them, barging in one their ‘Cuddle Time.’

It was… nice.

Jason learned, one night, the reason Damian went to get him was because he understood. He was the only other Robin who died, and came back to life. The only other one who knows the pain of dying. The only other one who understands the pain of resurrection. Who knows the hurt, the memories, the nightmares. They don’t talk about it, but it’s enough just to know there’s someone out there who gets it. It’s enough.

Jason didn’t expect to get along so well with Tim. But Tim, as it turns out, has a wicked sense of humor and a little rebellious streak. Tim’s became his go-to at Galas. In fact, Jason no longer dreads going to galas, he looks forward to them. Bruce dreads Jason going to galas, now, because he knows his two sons will only cause havoc. As they do.

It started when Tim became Jason’s date to the gala. Not seriously, of course, but as a prank. As it turns out, Tim can quite easily pass as a girl, and with a little makeup and a wig, he becomes unrecognizable. So, the plan Sex Scandal was a go. Jason and the ‘mystery girl’ supposedly had sex in every room of the gala, and then got engaged! That was all over the news for the next few weeks. Jason also learned, it issuper easy to fake sex. A little over dramatic, fake moaning, stay in the closet, or wherever, long enough to catch at least twenty fish in Animal Crossing, and then come out looking a little disheveled - easy. Besides, they had the bonus of Dick and Bruce going off about how utterly inappropriate it is for brothers to even pretend to do such a thing.

Worth it.

Tim also became his study buddy. Jason was able to start college again, and he loved it, he loved taking classes, learning about advanced literature and analyzing classics with people who were just as passionate about the stories as he was - it was everything he never knew he needed. He loved it. Did he already say that? But still, it’s true. Tim didn’t share his passions, as a matter of fact, he actually kinda sucks at writing. But that’s the point! Tim began to bring his English essays to Jason to edit, and through editing Jason got to practice the grammar he never got the chance to learn, while also helping Tim enhance his own writing skills. As they say, sometimes, teaching is the best way to learn.

As a bonus, Tim always made sure Alfred made hot chocolate before their study session, as Jason banned Tim from drinking coffee when he was around (and if Jason took it upon himself to get Tim over his caffeine addiction, who’s to stop him?) Jason started to bring different French pastries to the study group, and if they spend at least twenty minutes arguing which French pastry is superior, well, even the most studious of students need a break every now and again. The study groups became something more, as time passed. When it’s late at night and most of the bats are asleep, or off doing their own thing, their filters begin to recede and they start to talk about topics that have a deeper meaning. They talk about their parents, and Tim reveals how his parents were neglectful, about his abandonment issues, about his depression. Jason talks about Willis, and Catherine, and about how hard Cathrine had tried and how she failed. He talked about Sheila, and how he died protecting her despite the betrayal. He talked about the pit madness, and his anxiety, his self-worth issues, about how some days he wished he never forced his way out of his grave.

They agreed to go to therapy together. They agreed it’s time to heal, but neither were strong enough to do it alone. They learned they don’t need to do it alone.

Dick was a slow process. Dick tried too hard, tried to force their friendship, and it didn’t work. Until it did. It started when Jason expressed an interest in returning to school, and Dick jumped. He went head over heels, sitting down and looking up all the best colleges for literature. He talked with Jason for hours about what he’s looking for, which colleges had online courses, or if he was staying in Gotham, which college had the best programs. It was overwhelming, but Jason did enjoy it. Jason felt his chest warm, because someone else was just as excited for him to go to college as he was. Hell, someone believed in him, believed he could go to college, believed he could finish. Not even Catherine believed that.

Dick took him on Campus visitations. Dick walked with him through the tours, asking all the wrong questions, but Jason didn’t mind. He found it endearing, almost. After their college visits, Dick would take them out to celebratory dinner - that’s right, after every. single. one.

“What are we even celebrating?”

“Isn’t it obvious? We’re celebrating you!” Dick would laugh, pulling Jason under his arm and giving him an affectionate noogie, “Every visit is one step closer to you picking your college! What’s not to celebrate about that?”

Jason would blush, and Dick would pinch his cheeks with a little coo, “Oh, Little Wing, you’re so cute!”

This would end in Jason jamming his elbow into Dick’s rib, and then they’d argue and Jason would call them an asshole, and Dick would laugh it off and keep telling him how cute and precious he is. Their bond grew from there.

Dick started dragging him to different events, taking him to movies and nerdy little comic conventions. He even convinced Jason to cosplay as Wonder Woman, and Dick went as Superman. Bruce was both entertained and ashamed (‘why not go as Batman?), but when Dick and Jason convinced Tim to dress up as Green Lantern, Bruce was no longer entertained and disappointed, he was merely disappointed, and all his disappointment was focused on Tim. It gave Dick and Jason the chance to escape, and they ended up thoroughly enjoyed the convention. They got a lot of attention - and Jason would lie if he said he wasn’t absolutely glowing with all the attention his thighs got. The best compliment was when someone asked Jason to: “Crush me with your thighs. In the skirt. _Please_.” Dick had to drag Jason away laughing, because Jason was seriously considering going through with the request, for the meme.

Dick bought Jason chili cheese fries they very carefully eat as to not ruin their costumes, and when Tim finally escaped Bruce’s disappointment, he offered to take photos of his brothers. Jason won’t lie, either. Tim became a remarkable photographer, as he made Dick and Jason look powerful. Especially Jason. And the two of them together - oh damn. They were beautiful. Tim made Jason look beautiful. They really- well, Jason thinks they would make Clark and Diana proud.

And when they were leaving, and Dick leaned over to whisper to Jason: “Tim didn’t make you look beautiful, that was all you Little Wing, you and some confidence,” And Jason maybe felt like he was walking on cloud nine, and he was abruptly reminded of how he once idolized Dick - Nightwing - who was complimenting him so, and encouraging him so - and his chest warmed so nicely.

Dick was also the one who first discovered Jason’s autopsy scar. He walked into his younger brother’s room, not bothering to knock like the asshole he is, “Hey Jaybird, do you have an extra collared shirt? I may have spilled some food dye on all of mine - what the hell?”

Jason’s head snapped up, staring at Dick with horror. His secret, his shame - the one part of his body he hates more than everything -

Jason wouldn’t say he’s ashamed of his scars. He’s not. His scars remind him of what he survived, of what he’s overcome. This scar, though, it reminds him of his death. It reminds him of how he failed, how he fell, for he never deserved the Robin magic. Jason stumbled back, covering his chest best he could, “Get the fuck out! Now!” Jason began to breath rabidly, lungs not working quite right - faster and faster, he felt like he was hardly breathing in air at all and - there was a hand on his shoulder, and his hand was lead to Dick’s chest, forced to focus on his calm and even breaths.

Jason doesn’t know how much time passed, but eventually, he was calmed enough to speak, to be embarrassed about how easily it was for him to fall apart.

“Jaybird,” Jason looked away, “I didn’t know you had this.”

“I didn’t tell anyone.”

“…Why?”

Jason snorted, “Why? I hate it. I fucking - you saw me - I don’t want it!”

There was a pause of silence, and then Jason was pulled against Dick for one of his horriblle, amazing, loving Big Brother Hugs. “That’s ok. Let’s get rid of it.”

Jason jerked, “Wha- we can? How?”

“Yeah! We can get a tattoo to cover it, if you want. I know, no noticeable marks and all, but the scar is pretty recognizable anyway, so why not, yeah?”

Jason barely had to think about it, because he can… he can get rid of it now, he can cover it, he will be able to look into the mirror again without hating himself, “Yeah, let’s do it.”

Luckily they had a little artist in their brood, and the baby bird took coming up with he best tattoo to cover the scar as a personal challenge.

Somehow, along the way, Jason realized he is a brother. He’s a big brother, and a little brother, and even a son. He had a family, he had a family who loved him and cared for him, and he actually loves them too. All of them, for all their flaws and annoying habits, he loves them, and he’s willing to die for them. Any of them, all of them.

They found themselves in a collapsed building, a bomb carefully ticking down from twenty. Twenty seconds.

“Red Robin, I found an out,” That was Nightwing.

“Following.”

Jason let out a relieved breath. Dick and Tim were safe. They were safe. They were out. That only left him and Robin, trapped alone in their little air pocket. He looked over at the young boy, the boy who still has his whole life left to live, “Did you find an out?”

“…no.”

Jason heard Tim and Dick talking over the comms, he heard Bruce yelling at them for a report, he heard Bruce begging them to let him know they were ok. He heard Dick’s trembling voice, telling them to get out- to get out, sobbing about how he doesn’t know where the bomb is and how can’t find it. He heard Tim telling them how to diffuse the bomb, begging them to be close enough to do so. He heard their tears, their wavering voices, their pain. Because they knew, as much as Jason, as much as Damian… they all knew there wasn’t enough time.

Damian spoke quietly, just for him to hear, “Did it hurt, to die from an explosion?”

Jason won’t lie, “Yeah. But it wasn’t the bomb that killed me. It was the smoke, afterwards. Cause of death: smoke inhalation, that’s what it said on my autopsy.”

The boy nodded, and he seemed resigned. Resigned, ready to die. It was wrong, Jason thought, he was a kid. He was a fucking kid, and he shouldn’t be prepared to die. He should be fighting, crying, yelling. He should be begging Bruce to come get him, begging Dick to not let him go, cursing the villain who set up this trap.

This isn’t right, this isn’t right - this isn’t, this isn’t -

 _No more dead Robins._ It’s a promise, it’s a prayer. 

Jason smiled, softly, and clicked his comm. He made up his mind, “Hey Dick, Tim,” screw the no names in the field. Not now, when it’s his last chance to say goodbye, “Dad,” and they went silent, they were listening, they were hoping, “I love you guys so much,” _“-No Jason, don’t you dare-“_ “I didn’t think I would but, yeah, I love you guys. You… are my family,” _“-you aren’t allowed to say goodbye! You aren’t dying! Not again-“_ “And you forgave me. You forgave me before I could forgive myself,” _“ -I won’t let you! Superman! Superman will get here in time!-“ five more seconds. He wouldn’t make it in time_ , “Listen, please. I love you guys so much. Thank you.”

Jason moved, pulling Damian to his chest and turning his back to the bomb. To the explosion. Damian jerked, looking up to where Jason was smiling down at him, helmet gone, mask gone. His eyes widened and he began to struggle, “Don’t you dare, Todd! Don’t you dare! We go together! I won’t leave you-! I won’t let you leave me- no, no!”

Jason didn’t let Damian move, holding him tight, covering the small boy entirely with his body. He gently kissed Damian’s forehead, ignoring his please, ignoring his tears, “No more dead Robins. See you on the flip side, baby bird.”

The ground crumbled under the force of the explosion, and the only thing heard in the aftermath was the cry of a father who lost his son, and of brothers who lost one of their own.

The corpse of Jason Todd was smiling, wrapped protectively around the sobbing, breathing body of his little brother.

_No more dead robins._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the happy ending everyone wanted! A little late, but finally posted.   
> Everything is the same except for the very end, so you guys can either re-read it or skip to the end and read the alternate ending!

How did this become his life? The Bats were even more insufferable than normal, and Jason genuinely thought that was impossible. He really, truly did. However, like they always try to do, the Bats decided to defy his expectations and go above and beyond. In annoyance.

Like now.

As he stepped into his apartment, or one that was _supposed_ to be his apartment, and he knows it’s supposed to be his because it has his over the top bat security, his delicately placed hair in the crack of the door that would fall if anyone opened it - and yet, as he stepped into his apartment, none of his items were in it. Was he robbed?

Except he wasn’t robbed, because there was a little note in the middle of his once messy kitchen letting him know all his item were moved to his room within the manor. _Like hell_.

Before he even had time to think, he was on his motorcycle breaking every possible speed limit to arrive at Wayne Manor, jumping off his bike as soon as he parked, all but kicking open the doors and marching in, not caring to wait to be let in. If they are gonna break in and steal all his fucking stuff, then he won’t respect their ‘privacy.’ It seemed they were expecting it, though, because they were all not-so-coincidentally gathered in the dining room, with a - get this - with an empty spot set at the table, as if they were waiting for him.

Oh, _like hell_.

He very pointedly did not sit down, “What the hell did you people do?! Where’s my shit?!”

Bruce took a sip of coffee, and Dick smiled all too innocently. Much to his surprise, though, it was Tim who spoke around a mouthful of waffle, “We moved you into the manor.”

“I know! I mean, why the hell would you do that?!” Jason was very much not calm, and very much feeling the need to strangle a Bat.

Damian scoffed, his little baby kitten-trying-to-be-tough scoff, “You are clearly unable to care for yourself, so we have decided to be of aid.”

“I- what?!” Can’t take care of himself? He’s been fucking taking care of himself ever since he crawled out of the fucking Pit. And yeah, so maybe Thalia helped him for a bit, but after that! And- and even before he was adopted, when he was taking care of himself on the streets. When he was taking care of himself, and his dying mother. Hell, he has always been taking care of himself, he’s always been alone, he’s always been- he had to. He had to learn early to survive. So this? This freaking accusation? He’s not having it. “I have been doing just fucking fine, long before any of you gave a damn.” He was proud, just a bit, at how that put a little damper on their moods. Good.

His head snapped over when Dick gave a little sigh. This was his ‘I’m trying to be a good big brother to a ridiculous little brother and it’s tiring’ sigh. It’s the sigh Jason hates the most. “You got shot during last weeks case.”

“So?”

“You said you had it handled.”

“And I do!”

“So that’s why, when I went to your apartment, to check up on you, you didn’t have any pain med? And there was dental floss in your needle, and not any proper, y’know, medical thread?”

So, ok, maybe Jason has neglected getting proper stuff for a while, but that’s his problem, and his alone, “One, dental floss works and makes everything minty fresh,” It’s a plus, “Two, you shouldn’t have been in my damn apartment without me there!” Jason has been doing good. He hasn’t seriously attacked any of the bats for over a year. He hasn’t killed in over three months. Though, right about now, he feels like it’s time to ruin those records. These bastards deserve a bullet through the brains.

Not that he’ll do it, but by the way they all remain relaxed regardless of his anger, he has realized he’s probably been going too soft on them. Someone needs to get beaten up, and it’s going to be Dick. But before he could kick Dick’s ass in front of everybody, Alfred walked into the room. Which was, definitely, the one and only reason he didn’t beat up Dickie.

“Master Jason, I believe we both know dental floss is not to be considered proper medical equipment. I taught you better than that.” Jason’s anger quickly deflated into shame and embarrassment because, yeah, Alfred did teach him better, “I requested Master Dick and the others to move you into the manor, so you can receive proper support until you are able to correctly care for yourself once again.” Then, the old butler gave him the legendary ‘test-me’ eyebrow raise, and Jason swallowed, kicking the floor with a little sigh. He felt twelve again.

“I understand.”

“Now please take your seat, Master Jason. I will bring out your breakfast.”

Jason silently slid into his seat, ignoring the snickering of the other bats. Fuck them.

“I am glad you’re going to be staying with us, Jaylad,” Jason tensed, staring up at Bruce in utter disbelief. _What_? Bruce only smiled, “What? It is nice to have you back.”

Jason felt his cheeks burn with a blush, but he hid it under a very indignant, “Fuck you!”

No one seemed bothered, though. If anything, it spawned only more positive chatter, and Jason was left to once again wonder how this became his life. He also wondered, for just a bit, when the others began to understand him so well - and why he doesn’t seem to mind the fact.

Life at the manor was chaotic, to say the least. Jason knows, theoretically, Dick is supposed to be living in Bludhaven, but the asshole seems to be here more than not. He wondered how long that’s been the case.

He’s staying in a guest room, technically. One step into the room he had when he was Robin, when he was a child, when he was Bruce’s son - and he went running. It took Dick and Bruce talking him down, and ultimately Alfred promising to make up a new room for him, to get him back. That room, with all the memories and ghosts and magic was too much. It was way too much, and it only reminded him of everything he’s not, of everything he’s failed at, of everyone’s he’s disappointed.

Now, avoiding that room, he’s doing pretty well. As well as it could be for him, at least.

Jason woke up screaming. It was raining through patrol, and he may have been tossed into some mud, much to his embarrassment. He knew what it would trigger, though, looking down at the dirt dripping from his body - he was going to dream of his coffin, of suffocating beneath packed dirt, of broken fingers and blood drip, drip, dripping onto his face as he scratched at impenetrable wood. He dreamt, and when he woke throat raw, scream breaking on a sob, he looked over to see a little, pint-sized stalker staring at him,

Jason was really not in the mood to be berated by the little demon, so he simple scowled while aggressively rubbing the evidence from his eyes, “The hell you want?”

Damian tt-ed, “I request your presence in the movie room.”

“I-what?” That… certainly wasn’t what he expected.

“I’ll dumb it down for you’re delayed mind. I want you to join me for a movie. Immediately.”

Well, “Ok,” Jason knew he isn’t going to be able to sleep again, anyway. Besides, watching a movie with Damian would probably be a better way to spend the foreseeable future. Otherwise, he’d just sit in bed and fall prey to a panic attack as the nightmare, _the memory_ , plays over and over again in his mind. So, Jason rolled out of bed, silently following Damian into the movie room. Damian already had a movie paused, “The Cat Returns”, if Jason recognizes the title. “Studio Ghibli?”

“Drake is attempting to ‘catch me up’ on modern media.”

Jason huffed. He wouldn’t readily admit it, but he fell a bit behind in modern media too. Dying, and being kidnapped by the League of Assassin, and then going on a crazy revenge-fueled tirade, before going underground and becoming an outlaw, doesn’t give much time to watch movies. “Well, we can catch up together. How does that sound?”

Jason would swear on it, he saw Damian smile with a little nod.

Silently, they settled on the couch and started the movie. It felt nice, not talking. They were just there, for each other, without having to force interaction. As much as he’d never admit to loving Dick, the man always needs to talk and talk and fill the silence. Sometimes, it was exactly what they needed, but other times, it’s just too much. Overwhelming, really. Tim was nice, and he could go between comfortable silences and nice conversations, but sometimes Tim gets so distracted, it doesn’t feel like they’re enjoying each other’s company, but rather, simply, sharing a room. Damian somehow mastered this little, comfortable silences. It felt nice. And the movie, as ridiculous as it is, as much as Jason was feeling like a Furry watching it, it’s nice. It’s what Dick would call a ‘feel good’ movie, just something to make his brain go numb and enjoy.

At some point during the movie, Damian found his way into Jason’s lap, with Jason’s arms wrapped around his waist in a gentle hug.

At a later point, they fell asleep in that position.

When they woke, Tim was on the couch working on his computer beside them, Dick, somehow, squirreled his way behind Jason to support them both, and Bruce was beside Tim, reaching out to to have Tim tucked under his arm, and a hand on Jason’s shoulder, rubbing comforting circles into the tight muscle there. And if Jason let out a small, happy breath, curling further into his older brother to fall asleep again? He’s sure everyone noticed, but no one would dare say a thing.

History has a habit of repeating itself, so do these events. As it happened, Damian had the room next to Jason, which was why he woke to Jason screaming. That also means Jason can hear when the little demon wakes crying. Whenever Jason wakes to Damian’s screams, he finds himself wandering into the other’s room. Sometimes he drags his younger brother out to watch a movie, and sometimes he simply crawls in behind his younger brother, pulling him into a hug and reciting every story he’s ever memorized until Damian falls back into a peaceful slumber.

Whenever Jason wakes screaming, Damian comes in. Damian usually pulls him to watch one of the movies on what Jason learned is the younger boys very long and extensive movie list, and sometimes he drags Jason into the library and reads one of the books he picked off the shelf. They always ended up, by morning, with the rest of the family somehow crowded around them, barging in one their ‘Cuddle Time.’

It was… nice.

Jason learned, one night, the reason Damian went to get him was because he understood. He was the only other Robin who died, and came back to life. The only other one who knows the pain of dying. The only other one who understands the pain of resurrection. Who knows the hurt, the memories, the nightmares. They don’t talk about it, but it’s enough just to know there’s someone out there who gets it. It’s enough.

Jason didn’t expect to get along so well with Tim. But Tim, as it turns out, has a wicked sense of humor and a little rebellious streak. Tim’s became his go-to at Galas. In fact, Jason no longer dreads going to galas, he looks forward to them. Bruce dreads Jason going to galas, now, because he knows his two sons will only cause havoc. As they do.

It started when Tim became Jason’s date to the gala. Not seriously, of course, but as a prank. As it turns out, Tim can quite easily pass as a girl, and with a little makeup and a wig, he becomes unrecognizable. So, the plan Sex Scandal was a go. Jason and the ‘mystery girl’ supposedly had sex in every room of the gala, and then got engaged! That was all over the news for the next few weeks. Jason also learned, it issuper easy to fake sex. A little over dramatic, fake moaning, stay in the closet, or wherever, long enough to catch at least twenty fish in Animal Crossing, and then come out looking a little disheveled - easy. Besides, they had the bonus of Dick and Bruce going off about how utterly inappropriate it is for brothers to even pretend to do such a thing.

Worth it.

Tim also became his study buddy. Jason was able to start college again, and he loved it, he loved taking classes, learning about advanced literature and analyzing classics with people who were just as passionate about the stories as he was - it was everything he never knew he needed. He loved it. Did he already say that? But still, it’s true. Tim didn’t share his passions, as a matter of fact, he actually kinda sucks at writing. But that’s the point! Tim began to bring his English essays to Jason to edit, and through editing Jason got to practice the grammar he never got the chance to learn, while also helping Tim enhance his own writing skills. As they say, sometimes, teaching is the best way to learn.

As a bonus, Tim always made sure Alfred made hot chocolate before their study session, as Jason banned Tim from drinking coffee when he was around (and if Jason took it upon himself to get Tim over his caffeine addiction, who’s to stop him?) Jason started to bring different French pastries to the study group, and if they spend at least twenty minutes arguing which French pastry is superior, well, even the most studious of students need a break every now and again. The study groups became something more, as time passed. When it’s late at night and most of the bats are asleep, or off doing their own thing, their filters begin to recede and they start to talk about topics that have a deeper meaning. They talk about their parents, and Tim reveals how his parents were neglectful, about his abandonment issues, about his depression. Jason talks about Willis, and Catherine, and about how hard Cathrine had tried and how she failed. He talked about Sheila, and how he died protecting her despite the betrayal. He talked about the pit madness, and his anxiety, his self-worth issues, about how some days he wished he never forced his way out of his grave.

They agreed to go to therapy together. They agreed it’s time to heal, but neither were strong enough to do it alone. They learned they don’t need to do it alone.

Dick was a slow process. Dick tried too hard, tried to force their friendship, and it didn’t work. Until it did. It started when Jason expressed an interest in returning to school, and Dick jumped. He went head over heels, sitting down and looking up all the best colleges for literature. He talked with Jason for hours about what he’s looking for, which colleges had online courses, or if he was staying in Gotham, which college had the best programs. It was overwhelming, but Jason did enjoy it. Jason felt his chest warm, because someone else was just as excited for him to go to college as he was. Hell, someone believed in him, believed he could go to college, believed he could finish. Not even Catherine believed that.

Dick took him on Campus visitations. Dick walked with him through the tours, asking all the wrong questions, but Jason didn’t mind. He found it endearing, almost. After their college visits, Dick would take them out to celebratory dinner - that’s right, after every. single. one.

“What are we even celebrating?”

“Isn’t it obvious? We’re celebrating you!” Dick would laugh, pulling Jason under his arm and giving him an affectionate noogie, “Every visit is one step closer to you picking your college! What’s not to celebrate about that?”

Jason would blush, and Dick would pinch his cheeks with a little coo, “Oh, Little Wing, you’re so cute!”

This would end in Jason jamming his elbow into Dick’s rib, and then they’d argue and Jason would call them an asshole, and Dick would laugh it off and keep telling him how cute and precious he is. Their bond grew from there.

Dick started dragging him to different events, taking him to movies and nerdy little comic conventions. He even convinced Jason to cosplay as Wonder Woman, and Dick went as Superman. Bruce was both entertained and ashamed (‘why not go as Batman?), but when Dick and Jason convinced Tim to dress up as Green Lantern, Bruce was no longer entertained and disappointed, he was merely disappointed, and all his disappointment was focused on Tim. It gave Dick and Jason the chance to escape, and they ended up thoroughly enjoyed the convention. They got a lot of attention - and Jason would lie if he said he wasn’t absolutely glowing with all the attention his thighs got. The best compliment was when someone asked Jason to: “Crush me with your thighs. In the skirt. _Please_.” Dick had to drag Jason away laughing, because Jason was seriously considering going through with the request, for the meme.

Dick bought Jason chili cheese fries they very carefully eat as to not ruin their costumes, and when Tim finally escaped Bruce’s disappointment, he offered to take photos of his brothers. Jason won’t lie, either. Tim became a remarkable photographer, as he made Dick and Jason look powerful. Especially Jason. And the two of them together - oh damn. They were beautiful. Tim made Jason look beautiful. They really- well, Jason thinks they would make Clark and Diana proud.

And when they were leaving, and Dick leaned over to whisper to Jason: “Tim didn’t make you look beautiful, that was all you Little Wing, you and some confidence,” And Jason maybe felt like he was walking on cloud nine, and he was abruptly reminded of how he once idolized Dick - Nightwing - who was complimenting him so, and encouraging him so - and his chest warmed so nicely.

Dick was also the one who first discovered Jason’s autopsy scar. He walked into his younger brother’s room, not bothering to knock like the asshole he is, “Hey Jaybird, do you have an extra collared shirt? I may have spilled some food dye on all of mine - what the hell?”

Jason’s head snapped up, staring at Dick with horror. His secret, his shame - the one part of his body he hates more than everything -

Jason wouldn’t say he’s ashamed of his scars. He’s not. His scars remind him of what he survived, of what he’s overcome. This scar, though, it reminds him of his death. It reminds him of how he failed, how he fell, for he never deserved the Robin magic. Jason stumbled back, covering his chest best he could, “Get the fuck out! Now!” Jason began to breath rabidly, lungs not working quite right - faster and faster, he felt like he was hardly breathing in air at all and - there was a hand on his shoulder, and his hand was lead to Dick’s chest, forced to focus on his calm and even breaths.

Jason doesn’t know how much time passed, but eventually, he was calmed enough to speak, to be embarrassed about how easily it was for him to fall apart.

“Jaybird,” Jason looked away, “I didn’t know you had this.”

“I didn’t tell anyone.”

“…Why?”

Jason snorted, “Why? I hate it. I fucking - you saw me - I don’t want it!”

There was a pause of silence, and then Jason was pulled against Dick for one of his horriblle, amazing, loving Big Brother Hugs. “That’s ok. Let’s get rid of it.”

Jason jerked, “Wha- we can? How?”

“Yeah! We can get a tattoo to cover it, if you want. I know, no noticeable marks and all, but the scar is pretty recognizable anyway, so why not, yeah?”

Jason barely had to think about it, because he can… he can get rid of it now, he can cover it, he will be able to look into the mirror again without hating himself, “Yeah, let’s do it.”

Luckily they had a little artist in their brood, and the baby bird took coming up with he best tattoo to cover the scar as a personal challenge.

Somehow, along the way, Jason realized he is a brother. He’s a big brother, and a little brother, and even a son. He had a family, he had a family who loved him and cared for him, and he actually loves them too. All of them, for all their flaws and annoying habits, he loves them, and he’s willing to die for them. Any of them, all of them.

They found themselves in a collapsed building, a bomb carefully ticking down from twenty. Twenty seconds.

“Red Robin, I found an out,” That was Nightwing.

“Following.”

Jason let out a relieved breath. Dick and Tim were safe. They were safe. They were out. That only left him and Robin, trapped alone in their little air pocket. He looked over at the young boy, the boy who still has his whole life left to live, “Did you find an out?”

“…no.”

Jason heard Tim and Dick talking over the comms, he heard Bruce yelling at them for a report, he heard Bruce begging them to let him know they were ok. He heard Dick’s trembling voice, telling them to get out- to get out, sobbing about how he doesn’t know where the bomb is and how can’t find it. He heard Tim telling them how to diffuse the bomb, begging them to be close enough to do so. He heard their tears, their wavering voices, their pain. Because they knew, as much as Jason, as much as Damian… they all knew there wasn’t enough time.

Damian spoke quietly, just for him to hear, “Did it hurt, to die from an explosion?”

Jason won’t lie, “Yeah. But it wasn’t the bomb that killed me. It was the smoke, afterwards. Cause of death: smoke inhalation, that’s what it said on my autopsy.”

The boy nodded, and he seemed resigned. Resigned, ready to die. It was wrong, Jason thought, he was a kid. He was a fucking kid, and he shouldn’t be prepared to die. He should be fighting, crying, yelling. He should be begging Bruce to come get him, begging Dick to not let him go, cursing the villain who set up this trap.

This isn’t right, this isn’t right - this isn’t, this isn’t -

 _No more dead Robins._ It’s a promise, it’s a prayer. 

Jason smiled, softly, and clicked his comm. He made up his mind, “Hey Dick, Tim,” screw the no names in the field. Not now, when it’s his last chance to say goodbye, “Dad,” and they went silent, they were listening, they were hoping, “I love you guys so much,” _“-No Jason, don’t you dare-“_ “I didn’t think I would but, yeah, I love you guys. You… are my family,” _“-you aren’t allowed to say goodbye! You aren’t dying! Not again-“_ “And you forgave me. You forgave me before I could forgive myself,” _“ -I won’t let you! Superman! Superman will get here in time!-“ five more seconds. He wouldn’t make it in time_ , “Listen, please. I love you guys so much. Thank you.”

Jason moved, pulling Damian to his chest and turning his back to the bomb. To the explosion. Damian jerked, looking up to where Jason was smiling down at him, helmet gone, mask gone. His eyes widened and he began to struggle, “Don’t you dare, Todd! Don’t you dare! We go together! I won’t leave you-! I won’t let you leave me- no, no!”

Jason didn’t let Damian move, holding him tight, covering the small boy entirely with his body. He gently kissed Damian’s forehead, ignoring his please, ignoring his tears, “No more dead Robins. See you on the flip side, baby bird.”

* * *

The manor was mostly silent, no one daring to make a sound. Dick twitched on the couch, looking over at his brother's. Damian wasn't the same after the explosion, how could he be? It was horrid trauma; painful, soul aching trauma - the boy watched Jason hold him close, felt the explosion shake the very ground they huddled on, watched the fire envelope his dear older brother, helpless to stop any of it - Dick sucked in a sharp breath and shifted, reached out to pull his brother's tighter into his arms. 

Dick looked up, seeing Superman talk quietly to a worried Bruce Wayne. Not Batman, for once, but Bruce. The father, the father who was shaken up, eyes constantly darting back to the couch to ensure his son's were alive, to see them all together and - and breathing. Alive. Bruce Wayne, the Father, who nearly had to bury his son a second time. Something would have been wrong with the man if he wasn't fighting back panic, fear, and overwhelming relief. 

Relief, because Superman made it in time. 

Jason was still burned, badly, banged up and sore, but he was alive. Beautifully, painfully, alive. He was squished on the couch between his three brother's, Tim on his right and carefully leaning into his side, holding Jason's hand tightly in his own. Damian was on his lap, careful not to lean against any of the worst burns but refusing to remove himself from Jay's presence. He couldn't leave his brother right now, as he wouldn't be able to convince himself Jason actually made it out alive without seeing the constant proof. Without feeling his beating heart. Without being there. 

Dick isn't sure when Damian would be over this trauma, when he'd be able to comfortably leave Jason's side. 

Dick was to Jason's left, holding his younger brother tightly in his arms, making Jay lean against him and despite not being there, under the rubble, he think she may be in the same spot as Damian. He refuses to let Jason go anytime soon. 

"Guys," Jason's voice was rough, and tired, "It's ok. I'm alive. No need to be all clingy." 

"Shut up," Tim buried his face in Jason's shoulder, "We aren't letting you go anytime soon. Stupid asshole." 

Dick nodded, "You didn't, I mean, we thought we lost you," he heard Damian sniffled, and he felt his own tears began to burn his eyes, "We thought..." His arms tightened around Jason as he let his words trail off, the tragedy of what could have been lingering silently in the air between them. 

Jason sighed, "Yeah, yeah. Well if it makes you feel any better, I'll probably be stuck here till I heal so," so he'll be around here, around them, for quite a while long. Strangely, he can't bring himself to hate the thought of it, of being with his family.

"Like I'd allow you to leave, Todd," Damian's voice was small, and trembling. It felt so odd to hear him sound so vulnerable, and Jason longed for somehow making everything better. He knows he won't be able too. He knows it'll be a long and tedious journey of healing, of reassuring Damian he won't vanish, or die. A long journey of therapy. But Jason will be here, every step of the way. Jason won't abandon his baby brother. 

"No worries, baby bat. I wouldn't dream of leaving you," he couldn't dream of leaving any of his brother's now, as a matter of fact. He couldn't stop the small, shy smile from spreading on his face, and his free arm wrapped protectively around Damian, the other squeezing Tim's hand reassuringly and he finally relaxed. 

He's with his family now, so he knows everything is going to alright. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed the new ending! Finally something happy

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally supposed to have a happy ending, so if y'all are interested I can post the happy ending version? Unless we're all good with angst lmao. 
> 
> Let me know how you all liked it!


End file.
